Falling, it’s all I know all I ever will. Occasionally I see a lost soul like me floating endlessly in space. You’re probably wondering what I’m on about, well as so many people believe there’s either heaven or hell but what if you die a baby are you good or bad or if you have goodness to balance your evil. Well Then you’re the unluckiest of them all you come here. No burning or suffering no fun of meaning. NOTHING. So make up your mind because the indecisive are left forgotten. Make up your mind or the silence is coming.
Friday 18 May 2012
So here is my flash fiction Hope you enjoy.
Falling, it’s all I know all I ever will. Occasionally I see a lost soul like me floating endlessly in space. You’re probably wondering what I’m on about, well as so many people believe there’s either heaven or hell but what if you die a baby are you good or bad or if you have goodness to balance your evil. Well Then you’re the unluckiest of them all you come here. No burning or suffering no fun of meaning. NOTHING. So make up your mind because the indecisive are left forgotten. Make up your mind or the silence is coming.
Falling, it’s all I know all I ever will. Occasionally I see a lost soul like me floating endlessly in space. You’re probably wondering what I’m on about, well as so many people believe there’s either heaven or hell but what if you die a baby are you good or bad or if you have goodness to balance your evil. Well Then you’re the unluckiest of them all you come here. No burning or suffering no fun of meaning. NOTHING. So make up your mind because the indecisive are left forgotten. Make up your mind or the silence is coming.
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Thats really good
ReplyDeleteVery tense and menacing. I really enjoyed reading this, thank you.
ReplyDeleteI think this will be better. Checked grammar and punctuation.
ReplyDeleteFalling, it's all I know, all I ever will. Occasionally, I see a lost soul like me, floating endlessly in space. You're probably wondering what I'm on about, but well, as so many people believe there's either a heaven or a hell, but what if you die as a baby? Are you good or bad? Or do you have goodness to balance your evil. Well, then you're the unluckiest of them all; you came here. No burning or suffering, no fun of meaning. NOTHING. So make up your mind because the indecisive are left forgotten. Make up your mind or silence is coming.
This may not be 100 words anymore but although yours may be 100, there is no point of it if the punctuation is bad or the grammar is bad, or if it literally doesn't make any sense.
Nothing that makes no sense is a good piece of writing (unless that is the writer's intention, which this isn't.)